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| Aleisha Thiry has an incredible story to tell, needs our support |
ALEASHA THIRY (709060)
9 2924
Hello my name is Aleasha Thiry and I'm 33 years old. Currently I am serving a 4 year prison sentence and I reside at Robert E. Ellsworth Correctional Center in Union Grove, WI. I'm writing to share my story with others to bring awareness of how my life has been affected by not only the prison system but also largely by the department of children and families (DCF). I will begin by sharing a lot of background information about my life and will add to this over time. You may notice that some parts may overlap or be mentioned more than once...most likely with more detail. I hope my story can help others struggling so they know they are not alone and to let people in our state and country know what's really happening with the department of children and families and the criminal justice system!
I have three older half siblings...a sister, Carrie and brother, Cory on my moms side and a sister, Wendy on my dads side. Carrie is 6 years older than me. Cory is 8 years older than me. Wendy is 24 years older than me. I was born in Fort Dodge, IA. but moved to Wisconsin as a baby. My mother was 25 and my father was 43. My parents were never super wealthy but they made ends meet. My mother had a harder time as she was mainly a single mother of three children except when she had a boyfriend or husband. My mother went through many jobs while my father drove semi his entire life. I remember moving around a lot and every time we moved, my belongings were typically left behind or thrown out. Throughout my childhood I have moved at least 19 times. I lived in various cities such as Green Bay, Marinette, Howard, Abrams, Suamico, Ashwabenon, and Milwaukee. For the most part I lived with my mother primarily but I was with my father for some time. I recall not living with my parents at some point in my life but I did not remember this until many years into my adult life. I did end up asking my mom about it but she has told me she dunno what I'm talking about and that I have always lived with her or my dad. Heck, maybe she don't. She probably blacks out; I know I've blacked out things/times in my life.
Throughout my entire life, I have experienced a lot of traumatic events which I'll simply list here to keep things organized and simplified:
-3 years old: fell outta barn & was put in a complete body cast
-3 to 6 years old: sexually abused repeatedly by D.V.
-7 years old: sexually abused by K.B.
-7 to 12 years old: homelessness
-8 years old: hit by drunk driver, maternal grandma died, found bloody knife on dumpster
-9 years old: battles bruise
-12 to 13 years old: life with an alcoholic, my stepmother
-14 years old: life as an angry teen/threaten to runaway/threatened with being sent to an all girls school
-15 years old: D.V. cycle with S.J.
-16 years old: drugged & sexually abused by N.R.
-17 years old: drugged & sexually abused by T.W.
-18 years old: adult modeling, dad died
-19 to 24 years old: mentally, physically, emotionally, and sexually abused by T.N., D.V. cycle with T.N.
-23 years old: maternal grandpa died, children removed from our home by DCF
-24 years old: mentally, physically, and sexually abused by N.H., Deaths of two close friends/significant others (J.G. & N.H.)
-23 to 25 years old: alcoholic, drugs, struggled with childcare
-25 to 31 years old: mentally, emotionally, and sexually abused by T.T., D.V. cycle with T.T.
-28 years old: maternal uncle died, paternal grandma died,alcoholic
-28 to 31 years old: children removed from our home by DCF
-30 years old: mentally and sexually abused by T.N., adult industry, incarcerated
-31 years old: stepmother died
I have always had troubles with my memory and honestly do not have a lot of memories growing up. I know my sister, Carrie did a lot looking after me because our mother would work multiple jobs at a time to try supporting our family. However, I do remember things like growing up and having limited supply of food available so my mother would go without. At times, my mother, siblings, and I have lived in a motel, sometimes even different campgrounds, or from one of her boyfriends houses to the next. Throughout my years growing up, I have pretty much kept to myself. I had maybe 1-2 friends at any given time. I believed there was no sense in making friends because I was always moving. Through my elementary school years, I struggled with reading and received extra help in school. Middle school was pretty rough as I struggled academically a lot and spent hours upon hours on school work after school...basically until bedtime. Up until 9th grade, I was always heavier set and would be made fun of by other students which also only encouraged me to stay to myself. I began drinking regularly while in middle school. When I entered high school, I did very well academically but began using marijuana and skipping a lot of school. I was still passing all my classes though and I did end up graduating on time in May 2009! While in high school, I earned my certificate for certified nursing assistant and passed my state testing! All through school, I had behavioral problems which only increased as I got older. At 16 years old, I was diagnosed with ADHD/ADD an put on medication.
At the age of 14, I got my first actual job in the community. I have always been a person that learns fast and is a very hard worker. I have always been a person interested in learning new things and working and an education are two very important things to me! I always worked 1-3 jobs at a time to keep busy and to support my family. I ran into some troubles with childcare in 2016 and struggled for a short while being unemployed but eventually things ended up working out with the help of a local W2 program that I was enrolled in. After about 9 months, I ended up being a stay at home mom for about 6 months. I really didn't enjoy not working so I was somewhat unhappy but I did it because that's what made the most sense to do given my circumstances at the time.
Earning a college education and graduating is something I have always been determined to do! In high school, careers that interested me included: nursing, paralegal, and zoologist. Upon graduating high school, I enrolled in college at Central Arizona College where I was attending for 'pre-nursing' in person at their campus in Coolidge, AZ. My father ended up passing away after my second semester started there and I found out I was pregnant with my first child so I moved back to Wisconsin to be by my immediate living family members. I continued my college education and enrolled in college at NWTC where I was attending for 'health care business services and health information technology' online and in person at their campus in Marinette, WI. During my second year into my college education, I began to become very interested in being a psychiatrist which I'll talk about more later on. I stayed in college steadily until 2016 when I no longer received financial aid due to not passing a course I kept trying to retake. The course was chemistry and I needed it to get into the nursing program which has always been one of my main top career choices. Due to so much happening in my life, my college education was put on a standstill for multiple reasons: financially I couldn't afford it, not having adequate childcare, and not having enough time to dedicate to my courses. Overall I have earned over 80 college credits but unfortunately haven't even earned one associates degree due to bad planning and trying to do multiple programs at once. Since becoming incarcerated in 2022, I have restarted my college education in 2023 within a different field due to being barred from working in healthcare due to my criminal charges. I began taking courses in person and online through MPTC to work towards their 'business management' program. Recently I transferred to this minimum location so as of right now, my program is on hold due to no available clear book (laptop) and I have to wait until atleast 2025 to get going again. Its pretty unfortunate because even without being placed 'on hold', I was not going to graduate prior to my release. However there's an option to finish while I'm in the community. Another bummer is that my financial aid runs out two semesters before I complete the program so I don't know if I'll be able to pay for the remaining courses out of pocket.
As an adult, I have moved eleven times between Marinette, Peshtigo, and Neenah in Wisconsin and Casa Grande in Arizona. The majority of these moves were always to accommodate my significant other which I realize now shouldn't have ever happened. A lot of my life circumstances as an adult were significantly influenced by my significant other and I never realized how wrong all that was until I was removed from the toxic environments and received a lot of mental health help while I was first incarcerated. I fully take responsibility for my actions as I am the one who made them but I also want it to be known that I have had many struggles throughout my life and was not always in a healthy environment where I was able to think clearly and properly. I am always one to take care of everyone else and everything else yet still feel like deep down, I get nothing done. In my life prior to prison, I was always highly irritable and would scream a lot. I would also get caught up in my own compulsions like being a compulsive hoarder, workaholic, alcoholic, using and experimenting with drugs, gambling, and sexaholic. At times I'd loose touch with reality and my mates not being who they were in the beginning and not even really knowing who I truly am myself! Sometimes I would have no interest in sex and feel guilty to do anything for myself. Most days I had no energy to do everyday tasks. I would spend excessive amounts of time worrying about other people and their problems. It was always common for me to not feel close to anyone or have fun. I would isolate from activities/outings in order to know what's going on with my mate. It was common for me to have other moods controlling my emotions and I'd try to control other peoples feelings and behaviors. Eventually I began to doubt myself and let my need go unmet, love would disappear, and my needs would only become greater. Frequently I'd loose touch with my own emotions.
All of my relationships with other people have always been unhealthy and for the wrong reasons. I was not allowed to discuss problems openly, talk about feelings, or behaviors. I always wound up with sexaholics, alcoholics, addicts, and criminals. I never knew this until my incarceration. My friendships only ever were a thing if the other person could benefit in some way from being my friend whether it was getting free transportation, housing, or belongings. My dating relationships all fall in the domestic violence category and were all pretty toxic. I never learned healthy boundaries or healthy relationships growing up so I never knew better. I also didn't have others to really look up to in this area because my mother whom I lived the majority of my life with never really had friends while I was growing up. My father had a few but I was so little at that time and was not around often due to him working a ton and me living mainly with my mother. Also as a child, I pretty much was under the impression of staying out of the adults business because they were always busy and taking care of adult things. Don't get me wrong; we did do normal family things like parks, community events, parades, shopping, reading books, board games, outdoor games, swimming, amusement parks, vacation, and etc...
I married for my first time in November 2014 to my second baby daddy, Timothy after being together for 3.5 years. We stayed together until 2016 but did not get officially divorced until 2018. The second time I got married was in December 2020 to my third baby daddy, Troy after being together for 4.5 years. Currently we are still married but I have tried filing for a divorce and ultimately I think that's what needs to be done.
So, I come from a small family that is not very close knit. I've always wanted a large family so I decided to make that happen. I have seven biological children! I have four daughters and three sons. My children are:
Harmony (December 2010) father: Francisco
Damien (December 2011) father: Timothy
Savannah (December 2012) father: Timothy
Dontae (April 2015) father: Timothy
Blazyn (March 2017) father: Troy
Serenity (March 2018) father: Troy
Lilliana (April 2019) father: Troy
While married to Timothy I had one step daughter, Hailee (2003 or 2005). While married to my current husband, Troy I have one step daughter, Kailin (March 2007) and two step sons, Ashton (August 2010, deceased) and Kameron (March 2012). I always encourage open and honest communication between my children and me and do my best to foster a close relationship among us all! My children are my world and they are the most important to me. Everything I do, I do for them. They have always been well taken care of in our home and never went without things they needed. My children have always had pretty much all they would want. They are spoiled!!
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